


The Richard Nixon Robot Replica

by Holy_Leonards



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Crack, Dick Stabbing, Lasers, Noodles, Noodles save the day, death and destruction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-29
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-05-23 22:35:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6132376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holy_Leonards/pseuds/Holy_Leonards
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>That raider had no idea what he was unleashing upon the world. Luckily, Diamond City had the one person who could save everyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Richard Nixon Robot Replica

**Author's Note:**

> Happy leap day!

The raider made it back to his little hole in the ground that he called his home. There was just enough room in the hole for a sleeping bag and the body of the Richard Nixon Robot Replica. He had just scored the final piece to the presidential puzzle and he was gonna finish it so hard. He locked the robo penis in the slot and gave it a good twist. The robo penis wiggled a little and then the robit came to life. 

“Finally! My robot sexual fantasies will come true!”

The robit sat up and looked at the raider with its worn down Nixon face.

“Identification papers, hippie!”

“What?”

“Bbbbbbbbuaaaaah terminate!”

The robit stabbed the robo penis through the body of the raider and left him to die in the hole. The Richard Nixon Robot Replica stood up and proceeded to walk to Diamond City. 

When the robit got to the city, it demanded to be let in.

“Let me in dammit!”

“Back off robot!”

“I'm your damn president, hippie!”

“We haven't had a president in over 200 years!”

“THOSE TAPES WERE PLACED THERE HIPPE!”

The Richard Nixon Robot Replica fired lasers from its eyes. They disintegrated every security guard and he used the lasers to melt the door. He ran up the stairs and jumped through the doorway. He landed on his feet and fixed his eyes on the prize. 

He walked over to the noodle stand and took a seat. Everyone except for Takahashi was hiding and there was a dead silence in the air.

“Nan-ni shimaso-ka?”

“One cup of noodles, hippie!”

Takahashi served him a bowl and Nixon loudly slurped them down. His jowels flapping as he sucked in those delicious noodles.

“Thank you hip-ugggggggh”

The Richard Nixon Robot Replica fell apart pathetically and the entire population of Diamond City celebrated Takahashi for defeating the presidential menace.


End file.
